I’ve had a weird week.
Having had three to four years of wobbles, glums and academic stress I am starting to feel more like my old self again. There was a time when if anyone asked my friends the first word that sprang to mind was when they thought of me, they’d say ‘BALLSY!!’ (Some also admitted to my face that they’d rather spoon-feed a pissed off Rottweiler than get on the wrong side of me but thankfully that side of me grew up and moved on! Haha).
I used to love horse riding – I competed in a few Dressage competitions and even contemplated becoming an instructor in my early twenties, but we moved to another part of the country and by the time I was thinking about getting back into horse riding again, my body wouldn’t allow it. I could have switched to carriage driving, but though I enjoyed it there’s nothing like that close contact with your horse (or the mild thrill of knowing you might fall – fortunately I got really good at bouncing!).
So I kind of drifted along at this more serene pace, and thought it was OK with me. Well, that changed when I read THIS BOOK and the pennies started dropping in a big way. It was the smack round the back of the head I needed to make me realize ‘actually, I’m not living authentically. I’ve been sleepwalking and totally lost touch with my Wild Self’. My well-honed inner critic locked on to this realization and took exception to the way I’ve neglected my spirit, so now I resolve to do something about that.
Next year I will be getting my Wheelchair Accessible Vehicle which means total, unbridled freedom to do anything and go anywhere. I figure if I am going to get that much freedom back, why not go the whole hog? So now I’m selecting some experiences I wish to have in 2012. Of course I have to be sensible and realize that some things would just be damn stupid and really bad for my body, but within that there’s still a hell of a lot to choose from! So, I present to you the start of my 2012 Bucket List:
* Ice Hockey
* Four cross Mountain Biking/Mountain trike.
* Surround myself with Batshit-crazy enablers!! LOL.
This list will get longer, and I won’t cross everything off it in 12 months, but I can have a bloody good stab at it!! I know I WILL acquire some bruises, and that some of this WILL frighten seven shades of shit out of me but you know what? That kind of fear has to be far more healthy than the fear I’ve experienced whilst losing my identity. BRING….IT…..ON.
If anyone reading this is disabled and taking part in an extreme sport, or you’re able bodied and assist disabled people who do, hit me up! I am more than willing to be led astray…. **grin**.